note to self...

lasa trecutul acolo unde ii e locul...in amintiri...nu zice nimeni sa uiti...sa le incui undeva in adancul fiintei tale...pentru ca daca o sa faci asta...o sa gaseasca un mod de a iesi la suprafata si sa te roada...

fii prezent in fiecare clipa, si lasa la o parte atat trecutul cat si viitorul, pentru ca doar acea clipa te desparte de ambele ipostaze...

to be continued...

Now this is what we all need during finals :D

How many times have you begun to study for an exam and after 30 minutes get distracted and move on to doing something else, and at the end you are left with no other choice but to stay up all night studying for that final at 8:00 am? Well, Study Ball is here to solve the problem.

The Study Ball gadget is a prison-style ball and chain that you can program to keep track of how much time you spend studying. Once you’ve selected the desired duration, you chain the ball to your ankle and the manacle won’t come off until the schedule study time is up.
A red LED indicator displays the “Study Time Left“ and keeps you informed as to how much longer you’ve got to keep studying. The ball and chain are made of highly durable steel and weighs a total of 9.5 kg / 20.95 pounds, which makes it difficult to move while wearing it.

For safety, the Study Ball cannot be programmed for more than 4 hours. Minors should not use it unless supervised by an adult. It comes with a safety key for emergency deactivation.

© http://www.neatorama.com/2009/05/17/study-ball-makes-sure-you-study/

Simply sick

i'm like sooooooo sick of all the stupid games that are being played...i'm sick of myself because i have to play them...

i'm sick of all the times i try to do something for myself and never get the chance to do that...

i'm sick of all the people i meet...because they don't give a fuck and i sure as hell don't either...

i'm sick from not sleeping enough...and from too much caffeine...

i'm sick and disgusted and disappointed of everything lately...

i'm sick and tired of beeing love sick...with no one to love...

and no....i DO NOT, i repeat I DO NOT give a fuck about how you feel

Vid

esti acolo...si...nicaieri...nothing seems like...home...

iesi...te plimbi...mori de cald, de plictiseala...si...incerci sa iesi din tine...sa te duci iar in locul in care totul e ok, in care te gasesti...te regasesti...te pierzi...ca sa uiti de tine...de griji...de caldura si plictiseala...

dar nu...nu-ti iese nicicum...nu poti...nu ai cum...nu ai unde...vrei sa fugi...dar nu e nici un drum inainte...aleea trecutului se-nchide strans in urma ta si iti pierzi si dreptul la amintiri...nu te lasi sa stii, sa simti, sa vrei sa simti iar...

dai de un vid abisal...de o tacere asurzitoare...nu-ti ramane nici macar indoiala...nu te gandesti la ce ar fi putut fi...la cum ar fi fost daca....

doar scantei...scantei din ceea ce ai fost si din tot ce ai trait...nu-ti mai e permis sa te gandesti prea mult la ce a fost...dar, in acelasi timp, nu te lasa-n pace...

si vezi tot, ca printr-o felie de cascaval prea putin gaurit...si vezi tot...si nu e destul

cand ajunge trecutul sa fie destul?
cand se transforma totul in prea mult, dar nu suficient?
cand?

Me, myself and...I

I am... one in a million...[no...really...i am...proven scientifically :P]
I think... about every single little thing that crosses my mind...
I know... that you can never be sure of anything
I want... to be better than great
I have...huge dreams and expectations
I wish... i'd have enough time
I hate... snakes, carrots, waking up early
I miss... all the people who are no longer around
I fear... waking up one day to an empty world
I hear... the sound of life just happening everywhere around me
I smell... coffee...lots and lots of coffee
I search... answers and challenges
I wonder... how it would've been like if i were a man
I regret...NOTHING...live with no excuses, love with no regrets
I love... the idea of love
I care... about my friends and family...and about cute white polar bears :P
I always... act on impulse
I am not... interested in what others think about me
I believe... i can do whatever i want
I dance... in the rain, in the middle of the street, late at night
I sing... in private...for obvious reasons :P
I don't... take anything for granted
I write... when i'm angry, or in love, or whenever i feel the urge to do so
I win... when i smile
I lose... with my head up high, but, in the same time, thinking what had gone wrong
I dislike... people who are always late to a meeting/date/get together
I never... listen when i think i know what's best
I listen... to my friend's advices, even though i don't always apply them
I can usually be found... over the phone...in a coffee shop...out with my friends
I am scared... of heights
I read... between the lines...sometimes too much, i think...
I am happy about... every single little thing that comes my way
I dare... to put myself out there
I hope...for the best, when that's possible
I notice... small details
I clean... up my own mess
I express... part of my feelings through writing
I talk... to lots of people about whatever comes to mind
I go... out there and get whatever i want
I drive... everyone around me crazy if i don't get my way with something
I watch... all kind of teen movies :P
I dream...every time i fall asleep...and every waking second
I need... my close and good friend Teo by my side
I haven't... jumped off a cliff...yet...
I tell...people to take it one step at a time
I pick... on people in order to protect myself
I find... everything around me fascinating
I run... through my mind all the time, trying to analise everything
I quit... playing games with myself
I jump... to conclusions
I learn... how to keep cool...
I play... by my rules
I own... my thoughts and beliefs
I make... my own way through life
I live... life to it's fullest and then beyond
I bring... a touch of insanity in the lives of my loved ones
I open... myself in a heartbeat if i think it's worth it
I will... always follow my instincts
I suppose... there's always room for improvement
I vote...because i have the right to do so
I buy... chocolate, coffee, coca-cola, cigarettes, clothes, presents
I fold...paper cranes
I stand... up for what i believe in and for my friends
I can... do anything i set my mind to
I wear... my clothes, not the other way around
I smile... when i'm angry, i cheat and i lie:P
I cry... when no one can see me
I pray... all the time for my loved ones
I make... myself heard
I like... to take some time off and enjoy a good book once in a while
I move... back and forth between ideas
I swear... too goddamn much :D
I try... to be less impulsive
I draw... an impression of the world with my own tools
I expect... NOTHING in order to get everything i could ever think of
I work... hard and give my best to do things right
I admire... people who take chances, who put themselves out there and dare to make a difference
I adore... watching my little brother sleep
I fantasize... about the purest idea of love
I look... forward to see what's next
I cherish... my memories, my friends, my family
I appreciate... people for being there in times of need...
I treasure... everything that came my way
I could... go on and on talking about myself if i get the right vibe from the person next to me

So...this is what?

what happens if you put yourself out there...expecting nothing...feeling like nothing could touch or impress you...like you know there's gotta be something more to life than this, but you can't just seen to figure out exactly what...like you're living it...i mean IT!!!...what you only see in movies...but...sadly...you stand back and watch your whole life like a movie...all your memories...all your feelings...not yours anymore...like they never seemed to be in the first place...

flashbacks...bet you get that all the time lately...like there is no present...and no past...just pictures in your head..like everything is made-believe...voices...oh so distant voices...feelings...a certain smell you can't quite remember where you know it from...rushes to do..and live...and let yourself feel...but you don't seem to dare...cuz nothing can move you right about now...

and you try to have fun...you actually ARE enjoying the moment...every second of every step you take...the smell of coffee...the smell of your perfume...the smell of the crowded and never ending streets...but you can hardly smell life...passing you by...and, every once in a while, giving you the chance to peep to what seems to be your life taking place without you even noticing...

i tell you to be strong!!!get your ass out there and do something for a change...make sure YOU write the script to your life...make each and every one around you act on your words...make them feel like they're taking part in your play...get involved...be present in your own life...do not...i repeat....DO NOT cut your life into pieces...do not even think about giving in...

mkay...school's over...go play...